Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
