2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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