Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
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