My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize