They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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