Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
