I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Randomize
