I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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