Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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