so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
