It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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