P.S. I can't hear my feet
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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