youre lurking in front of me
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
