I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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