I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
