and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.