Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(858): View more from California

So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.

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(207): View more from Maine

i will never coherently bang her

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(407): View more from Florida

We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(401): View more from Rhode Island

i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'

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(301): View more from Maryland

Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?

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(289): View more from Ontario

He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila

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(908): View more from New Jersey

so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand

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