I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
