just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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