so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
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