I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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