I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize
