You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
So much Jack, so little girl.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Randomize
