Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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