isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
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I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
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