Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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