he told me I talked like a deaf person
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize