im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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