Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize