apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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