Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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