I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I am mentally ready for anal.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize