i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize