Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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