Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
