hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
