she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
