It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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