I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Randomize
