Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
