On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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