I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
