You just made me feel so damn special
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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