is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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