yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
