Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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