Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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