i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I forgot wine drunk hurts
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
