she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Randomize
