Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
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i wish my penis had a tongue
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
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I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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