his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize