he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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